After the subpar standards of season two in Miami and the obnoxious Ronnie-and-Sam-are-insane season three (seriously, Ronnie? You think destroying ALL of Sammi’s posessions including her glasses is an adequate and equal response to her dancing with another guy at a bar?), I’m seriously hoping that season 4 brings a little less drama and a little more of what made the show a cult classic to begin with – some Italian food, some fist pumping, a little hair poof and maybe a couple of punches. The promo delivered all that and more … are we going to see part 2 of the infamous hot tub hookup between the Sitch and Snooki this season?

Check it out below and check back with us on August 4 as we blog the anticipated season 4 premiere!

Courtesy of MTV

Fist pumps, my dear readers! You may have noticed that Hairpoof all but disappeared during season two, and there’s a very good explanation for that (namely: SEASON 2 SUCKED!), but we have high hopes for season 3.

Our favorite guidos are back in Seaside Heights, and with that return comes the return of not-douche Vinny (at least so far), the duck phone (why didn’t it ring last night?!) and all of our favorite bars (Karma, Beachcombers, etc.). It also brings the unfortunate return of crazy Sammi and Ronnie, and a brand new cast-mate, Snooki’s “friend” Deena – did Emilio, Snooki’s ex, let us in on some reality of the reality show when he tweeted that Snooki had never met Deena before filming begana?

The season began watching everyone pack up and head down tha Shore. If we happen to hit a fourth season of this show, can we please omit this section? It was cool to see where the cast came from before they were stars in season one, and funny to see Pauly and the Sitch, and Snooki and JWoww try to maneuver a road trip to Miami in season two, but this season it’s strange. We already know that Pauly is going to bring a bajillion hair products, we don’t need to see it again.

Sammi and Ronnie, who will “have their one year anniversary” at the shore, drove together like the lovebirds that they are.

First things first – you can’t have a one year anniversary until you’ve been together for a year. You started hooking up in August of 2009. You broke up on the reunion show in early 2010. You were apart for most of the summer and then got back together after Ronnie hooked up with a crap ton of grenades in Miami. I’m sorry, but doing the math there, you have definitely not hit a year.

The anti-social couple arrived first and decided that they wanted to piss everyone and their mother off as much as possible so they took the room on the second floor with three beds because “it’s nicer and has a nice bathroom,” completely disregarding the fact that the ground floor has a two person bedroom which they could have turned into a cozy love nest.

Doesn’t matter — now it’s just like they’re trolls under a bridge (except upstairs) as three of the seven cast members will never walk up the steps again.

Whorebags JWoww arrived next and walked upstairs, hoping against hope that she and the other ladies could capture the loft for their own den of love. Ronnie, the mature being that he is, decided it would be awesome to run into the bathroom and leave Sammi alone to confront her enemy. Would this be our first clash of the season? Sadly, no, JWoww walked half way up the stairs, saw Sammi and then turned around without saying a word to skulk around the first floor.

After the other cast mates arrived, they decided to have a welcome lunch to get to know Deena. Ronni and Sammi came downstairs from their castle in the sky which they will be forced to share with the Sitch and tried to play nice.

It didn’t work so well since Sammi decided she wanted to take over Angelina’s role of being a bitch for no reason to everyone in the house. One word answers abounded and finally she got so fed up that she had to be in the same room as the others that she left to go hold her hair extensions alone upstairs.

Ronnie soon joined her as the others decided they wanted to have fun and play flip cup (or “flip the cup” as Deena called it) and Ronnie doesn’t like to have fun – it’s why he’s dating Sammi. They had a heart to heart about what Ronnie would do in Sammi’s situation and then looked at each other all doe-eyed, oblivious to the outstanding drama happening outside.

Deena, Deena, Deena. What can we say about you? You’re a firecracker who won’t burn half-assed like Angelina. You seem to have watched the first two seasons of the show and thought you understood how the cast members interact so you came in half-cocked and ready to fire. Not only did you almost get it on with Vinny in the hot tub (poor Snooki had to witness their awkward flirtation), you showed the Sitch your Na na and your outstanding cowboy hat, AND you called Sammi the c-word and managed to wake up Hulk-Ronnie by referring to him as Sammi’s boyfriend. Girl, as the Sitch said, you are audacious (wait, Holy Shit! Sitch knows what the word audacious means enough to put it in a sentence?!) and will be a pleasure to watch this season.

Are you guys ready for more of Season 3? How many of you are pissed at MTV for cutting this episode at the exact moment that JWoww and Sammi started swinging at each other? And who wants Sammi to STFU and go home?

More gems from episode 3.1:

–How sweet is Vinny? He and Snooki apparently had a conversation between Miami and Jersey where she told him she like LIKED him, liked him. Sadly, Vin didn’t feel the same way because “he has a penis” and didn’t want to be tied down to one girl. He did, sweetly, extract himself from her drunken embrace in the hot tub saying he didn’t want to hook up with her because he knew if he hooked up with other girls – which he will – she would get hurt.

–THE SITUATION KNOWS THE WORD AUDACIOUS!

–Pauly and Vinny are going to be roommates. Is this the start of a tighter bromance between VP than MVP?

–How annoying are Ronnie and Sammi? Ugh.

–When the Pauly walked into Sammi and Ronnie’s room to debate moving in with them Sammi’s clothes were in a ball at the bottom of her bed. She brought luggage. Why would she dump it out? Our theory is that she’s embracing the dirty little gerbil title that Angelina left behind.

–How will Deena fit in the house? It’s dangerous to have three girls in one place, one will always feel left out. Does this mean that JWoww will be left out to dry, or will she and Snooki fall back to their old, chummy ways and leave the new girl out??

Karina Smirnoff holds a photo of DWTS partner Mike "The situation" Sorrentino

Well, week 1 of Dancing With The Stars is in the history books, and our darling Situation is safe.

He came, he sort of practiced, he awkwardly half fist-pumped — and he had pretty amazing lines when he actually hit the Cha-Cha steps with partner Karina Smirnoff.

While, Len Goodman said he “had the guns, but not the ammunition,” and Carrie Ann and Bruno both stated that it was impossible to hold Mike to the same level as the other contestants because he had only had 5 days to practice as opposed to everyone else’s 21.

Next week, however, all bets are off and he needs to step up his game if he wants to stick around the competition.

Based on week one, however, there are a few people Mike needs to watch out for. Jennifer Grey (of Dirty Dancing and Ferris Bueller fame) and Kyle Massey (from Disney’s That’s So Raven, and Corey in the House) are the obvious -and somewhat surprising – standouts.

That’s not to say the other’s won’t be difficult competition. Audrina from The Hills may take some of the MTV viewer vote away from the Sitch; Margaret Cho is already setting herself up as the dancer with the schtic, so the Sitch can’t fall back on GTL or any other mantras he might have had at the Shore; Rick Fox and Kurt Warner will have the stamina to withstand stressful situations week after week; and Brandy has some obvious dance experience, but her completely Botoxed face may scare some voters off. I swear her forehead NEVER MOVES!

Florence Henderson on DWTS

And then there’s Florence Henderson, also known as Mrs. Carol Brady. Mike needs to especially watch out for her since she seems either intent on taking the nickname away from him with her OWN situation, or creepily making herself into a cougar as she requests to touch his situation.

Hope you’re all enjoying seeing Mike three times a week! We’ll be back next Tuesday with a wrap-up of Mike’s hopefully better rehearsed second dance – this time it’ll be ballroom instead of Latin.

Photo courtesy of ABC

We have yet to see our first glimpse of Mr. Sorrentino looking dapper and dandy on Dancing With the Stars. He was wrapping season 3 and doing promotions for Jersey Shore when his 11 competitors were shooting promos, doing interviews about their famous mothers and learning their first routines. In fact, the Situation had to truncate his rehearsal time due to all of his commitments (Word of the day – a la Snooki – Truncate), so he has only been practicing for two weeks as opposed to the other competitor’s four.

One question has already been answered: How long will it take for the Sitch to show off the Situation? The Answer: Not even the first episode, as his promo photos show him in an open suit vest with a Rosary around his neck.

However, tonight, all the rest of our questions will be answered and Mike takes the floor with Karina Smirnoff. We hope to have a wrap-up of his first episode up tomorrow!

This definition – that we just made up – is coming into play in a big way when it comes to our favorite pint-sized guidette, Snooki.

The New York Observer is reporting that Coach and many other handbag brands are engaging in a duplicitous practice of trying to associate their competitors with the Jersey Shore star. In Season One and supporting appearances last year, Snooki went everywhere with her Coach purse. Now, it seems that she has a new handbag every other week.

And while the JS darling is making bank with each new episode – The Situation stands to make $5 mil. this year, so we assume she’s somewhere in that price range as well – she doesn’t seem like the kind of person who would go on a hand bag shopping spree when there are things like rhinestone covered sunglasses to be had.

So where is she getting all of them? Why, they’re free, of course!

Rumor has it that Coach didn’t want to become synonymous with anyone on Jersey Shore, so they sent Snooki a free handbag from a competitor. Once she started taking that one out, the competitor sent her a free bag from a DIFFERENT competitor, and so on.

It’s a vicious cycle, and one in which Snooki wins immensely as the brands try to out do the others and make them lose.

At the same time, though, it’s kind of mean. Snooki is reviled enough by these brands thtat they don’t even want her to be seen carrying one of their bags?

Now, we love Coach (we sold our soul the first time we purchased a clutch and it’s been downhill ever since) and we love Jersey Shore. But we weren’t carrying our Coach purse just because Snooki was. And if we hated Jersey Shore, we wouldn’t be putting our Coach clutches away just because Snooki is carrying one around.

So really, Coach, we know you want to be perceived as a luxury brand, but Snooki doesn’t deplete that luxury. Hell, I bet most people weren’t even looking at her purse as they watched her chase gorillas or get punched in the face.

So, Snooki, clean up and take these “brands” for all they’re worth! Work it!

Image courtesy of MTV/Jersey Shore

One of our dear juiced up guidos is in trouble with the law again…he’s bound to be making friends at the Seaside Heights police department since he’s there so often…

That’s right, Ronnie is in trouble with the law again. NY Daily News is reporting that he was arrested Sunday due to outstanding warrants – allegedly due to two outstanding parking tickets.

The Seaside Heights police department confirmed that Ronnie was indeed taken into custody, but that he was released after satisfying the conditions of his warrants … aka he paid his parking tickets.

Let’s hope the MTV cameras picked up every second.

As much as we love him, and the juiciness he adds to the Jersey Shore cast, and as much as we can’t blame him for banking the name in as many different ways as possible (Sitch, honey, you tried the rap route…let’s let that one die), we have to admit he is kind of an ass.

This is the guy who facilitated Snooki getting punched in the face, and then creeped on some chicks as Vinny and JWoww helped as she cried in the bathroom, after all.

After last night’s much-debated premiere — a lot of the blogosphere thinks the magic has worn off, whereas we’ll give it at least two more episodes to entertain us past Angelina being abso-fricken-lutely insane and JWoww hating on her and Sammi; hell, if we could see more drunk Ronnie with grenades and landmines, we’d be happy — it’ll be interesting to see the general public’s reaction the Sitch and the rest of the gang, who are currently filming Season Three in Seaside Heights.

But, even if Season Two isn’t as huge as the phenomenon that was the first season, the Sitch could be back on our TV’s very soon on another reality television show – DANCING WITH THE STARS.

Now, we here at Hairpoof aren’t huge reality TV fans. We can do without The Bachelor/ette, Survivor, even the Real World, but Dancing With the Stars is amazing. We’d love to see the Sitch two-stepping with Cheryl Burke or Kym Johnson, and we’re sure the Sitch would love to cling to those scantily clad women. Mike’s manager has shot down the rumors saying they have no plans for the show at this time, but TMZ reports that the deadline for negotiations on the next season of DWTS is Monday, so we should know by then.

Photo courtesy of MTV

Deena Nicole Cortese is spotted out with Vinny during filming for Jersey Shore Season 3

With the premiere of Season Two still 8 hours away, we just learned some crucial information for Season Three, currently filming in the original house in Seaside Heights, NJ. According to People Magazine, ANGELINA, who we like to affectionately refer to as the “non-cast member,” IS OUT FOR SEASON THREE!

In her place, MTV has picked up Deena Nicole Cortese from New Egypt, New Jersey. Deena Nicole is reportedly friends with Snooki and has been for a number of years. Before leaving for the shore house, People reports that she said she won’t be GTL’ing, especially since her mom still does the 23-year-old’s laundry, but she will be BBB’ing – she needs beats, booze and her broads.

We’re looking forward seeing her fist pump with our favorite guidos and guidettes. No word yet on when Season Three will air.

Ever since filming began way back on March 22, we’ve been treated to hints and tips of what’s going to happen this season. So far we know that the boys of the house had a hook-up tally, Vinny hooks up with Snooki, Sammi and Ronnie are walking on eggshells around each other since they broke up, JWoww potentially throws down with Angelina AND Sammi, there was supposedly a grenade ban on the house, and the cast worked at a gelato shop. Oh, and Mike, Vinny and Pauly are calling themselves MVP and Angelina actually picked up some real luggage sometime between packing her garbage bags in episode 3 of last season and fame-whoring her way back into the cast this season.

While we’ll get to see all the action unfold tonight at 10 p.m. – as far as we can tell episode one will follow Pauly D and The Sitch, and Snooki and JWoww as they road trip to Miami (meaning we get to see the infamous “Who does AAA call when AAA gets stuck?” scenes) – there’s nothing wrong with enjoying a little Jersey Shore to get you in the mood all day.

Enjoy! And we’ll see you back here tomorrow for a wrap up on episode one!

Will JWoww, the Situation, Snooki and Pauly D be the only four JS-ers back for Season Three?! Photo courtesy of MTV

Reports are coming in today that a third season of Jersey Shore is in the works.

You might think we’d be rejoicing at that news and we are to an extent. We can’t wait to see Season Two which debuts on July 29 and a third season sounds just as epic.

However, rumor has it that ONLY Snooki, JWoww, Pauly D and the Situation have been offered contracts for the season and Vinny, Sammi, Ronnie and Angelina are being left out on the boardwalk to dry.

PerezHilton reports that MTV was “underwhelmed” with the latter four’s performances on the second season and are looking into recasting their spots in the shore house to provide more entertainment and drama.

While we don’t care that Angelina is going to be gone – the Sitch’s analogy still rings true, “she was a half-assed fire cracker. She fizzled out real quick and then made a loud noise” – we can’t condone dumping Ronnie, Sammi or Vinny. Especially Vinny! He may have started as that quiet kid who could have been a neighbor hanging out in the shore house, but he soon found a way into our hearts as a complete mamma’s boy with Harvard intentions.

Shame on MTV for introducing a crappy “cast member” from the second season only to strip us of three of our favorites for the third.

Let’s hope a yay or nay comes out on this one real quick so that we aren’t kept in suspense.